With the release of the sixth film in the V/H/S Franchise, V/H/S/85 (A Shudder Original) it is a good time to rank all of the shorts in the V/H/S Franchise. This will not include the Frame narrative shorts in the films. I am sticking to the actual shorts in these six films, 25 in total.

25. Bonestorm – V/H/S Viral

Easily the weakest in the entire franchise. Stealing the title from a video game in the Simpsons universe, even though the title does not make sense. It’s a title as lazy as the short is. A group of teenage skaters go to Tijuana to film themselves skating only to be attacked by demon skeletons.

The kids are annoying, the skeletons don’t make sense. If you want to watch kids hit skeletons with skateboards enjoy. It’s terrible to think that this franchise almost died with this as the last short to show for it.

24. Shredding – V/H/S/99

The first short from the latest entry in the V/H/S franchise. Like many other shorts in this franchise, it features teenage kids doing what they do, be annoying. A band called R.A.C.K. decide to put on a show in a club that had burnt down three years prior and the performing band Bitch Cat was trampled.

The four main kids are uninteresting and the “ghosts” of the band Bitch Cat look like a high school play-quality make-up. Some interesting editing choices but overall these characters are not compelling enough to care about.

23. Phase 1 Clinical Trials – V/H/S/2

A somewhat interesting yet hokey premise. A man gets an experimental procedure where a camera is installed in his eye. Then he begins to see ghosts. A woman comes to his house and explains that the camera is allowing him to see ghosts like her cochlear implant allows her to access different frequencies.

It’s a cool thought that falls flat because of a less-than-stellar performance from Adam Wingard. Yes, the man who brought us Godzilla v Kong got his start in horror. He is a good director, especially his horror sense. Should just stay behind the camera.

22. Dante the Great – V/H/S Viral

Told in a popular found footage style, the mockumentary. A man trying to become a famous magician comes across a cape with special powers. Through the mockumentary, it is revealed he is using this power for sinister reasons.

It’s another interesting premise but this film commits a cardinal sin in the found footage genre which ranks this low. At times we do not know who is filming. There are scenes filmed like a normal film, showing Dante and his assistant having conversations while someone films. But no cameraman is alluded to. We should always know who is filming in-found footage.

21. To Hell and Back – V/H/S/99

Two friends are hired to film a cult ritual. It is quickly revealed that they are a coven of witches using a person as a gateway to hell. The two friends are dragged into hell when the gateway is opened.

Played for more of a comedic effect rather than horror. It feels like an odd short to end this film with. Some of the production value is good, especially for a low budget. Maybe on a re-watch, this could be higher, but its tone felt a little all over the place.

20. TKNOGD – V/H/S/85

Like many of the shorts within this franchise, it’s a cool idea with some poor execution. A woman demonstrates a VR headset that allows you to exist in two plains at once. Of course, things go poorly.

Boasting some great practical effects that come at the end of the short. Unfortunately, you have to wait through ten minutes of slam poetry. If this short didn’t have the final payoff this would easily rank as one of the worst shorts in the franchise.

19. Tuesday the 17th – V/H/S

A Group of friends are going out to the woods to hang out for the day. Turns out one friend has an ulterior motive to going out into these woods. She is seeking revenge for some murders that happened years earlier.

A classic setup that I do not think sticks the landing. It's an evil that can only be seen on film, but the way the entity is shown is through glitches on the screen. It becomes overly reliant on the glitches and becomes tiresome.

18. God of Death – V/H/S/85

This starts with a Latin news production. We watch a female newscaster get ready while the behind-the-scenes crew gets things together. Then a massive earthquake happens and everything goes bottom up.

Maybe it’s coming off of watching a docuseries about 9/11 but the being buried and a team of rescuers trying to get out while it continues to collapse is terrifying. The film takes an As Above, So Below route, so the premise outshines the execution.

17. The Gawkers – V/H/S/99

It was an interesting choice to not have a frame narrative for this entry in the franchise. Instead, we find out the stop-motion shorts being shown are part of this short. A group of teenage friends films themselves while the main character’s younger brother makes these animated shorts.

The boys become obsessed with their new female neighbor who moves in next door. She ends up befriending the younger brother. When asked if he can install her webcam the boys convince the brother to hack it so they can watch. Obviously, things take a turn.

It’s a turn you will not see coming but the short is essentially over after the reveal. If there had been more of a third act this could rank higher.

16. Ozzy’s Dungeon – V/H/S/99

It opens with a kid’s games show that is a combination of Double Dare and Legends of the Hidden Temple. A girl becomes injured on the set in the final obstacle race, the girl does not get her wish that would’ve been granted had she got to the end in time.

The girl’s mother takes this personally and that is all I will say on this short. I won’t say more because the twists do work, but the short itself drags on a little longer. However, I still think it’s one of the better shorts in the latest film in the V/H/S Franchise.

15. Parallel Monsters – V/H/S Viral

A man makes a portal to a parallel dimension. He and his parallel universe-self decide to trade lives for fifteen minutes. What happens in those next fifteen minutes that no one is ready for. It’s a cool idea that moves into goofy territory pretty quickly.

Nacho Vigalondo brings a fresh mind to the V/H/S Franchise. He is able to thread that needle of horror and comedy. Though I think this may have gone a little too goofy, it is still a worthy entry in the V/H/S canon.

14. No Wake – V/H/S/85

Up-and-coming director Mike P. Nelson constructs a fascinating short that comes close to being an all-time great V/H/S entry. Seven friends go out camping near a lake and are attacked by someone with a rifle. I don’t want to say much because the twist is great.

When this short ended, I was so mad because it wasn’t a complete story, but it came back in a great way. I think this short leaves you with more questions than answers, but there is still a lot to admire here.

 13. Terror – V/H/S/94

In the early 90’s the US was fraught with different militia groups mobilizing with distrust of the Government. After Ruby Ridge and Waco, there was a lot of distrust of the government. This film positions itself in this world. Following a white supremacist group who has a special weapon. They are going to use this weapon to blow up a government building.

This is a solid satire of these groups and shows why they never are able to materialize their vision. Funny, bloody, and violent, with a message. It is a great entry into the franchise, especially making it feel like the time it is supposed to take place.

12. Dreamkill – V/H/S/85

A teenager is having dreams of murder and his V/H/S Camera records them. They’re premonitions because the murders happen days later, so he sends them to the police. The police catch on, stake out the mailbox, and catch him to talk to him. What they discover is something they couldn’t even imagine.

With the talent of Scott Derrickson (Sinister) at the helm, it’s no surprise that this short is the cream of the crop in V/H/S/85. The break-in murder sequences are especially horrifying, reminiscent of another Derrickson film Sinister, and the home movie Ethan Hawke watches. This short could be a feature-length film, just need to workshop the ending; it keeps it from being great.

11. Slumber Party Alien Abduction – V/H/S/2

A group of teenagers are left to their own devices for the night when their parents leave for an unspecified overnight. Well, what happens next is basically in the title. The kids are attacked by aliens.

Upon a re-watch, this short grew in my estimation. I used to not like this short because the kids are insufferable. Listening to kids insult each other for 20 minutes can really grate on an audience.

But when the terror kicks in the short works. It just takes a long time for that to happen. When it does the film relies too heavily on camera glitches for scares.

 10. The Subject – V/H/S/94

Tetsuo for the modern day. The second film by Timo Tjahjanto in this franchise. While not as strong as his first entry he wrote and helped direct, it is just as bananas.

A doctor is attempting to build the first half-human half-robot. The second half of the short is told through the perspective of a female whose eye is a camera.

Truly an insane short that only a singular mind like Timo could conjure up. Though the short runs a little long, and it looks a little crisp for 1994, it is still stellar. For the fans of body horror, this film has everything, Timo never skimps on the gore.

 9. Second Honeymoon – V/H/S

Directed by Ti West and Starring Joe Swanberg and Sophia Takal. It follows a couple on a road trip vacation through the Southwest. At night someone following the couple keeps sneaking into their motel room and filming them as well as messing with their stuff. It builds to a twist ending that is disturbing.

The clan of Adam Wingard, Ti West, and Joe Swanberg have their DNA all over the first V/H/S. As a fan of theirs, it’s no surprise this one ranks high for me. This has Ti West’s signature slow burn of a story. This one is genuinely creepy leaving out all of the jump scares in trade for atmosphere.

 8. Amateur Night – V/H/S

The very first short film (not including frame narrative) in the V/H/S franchise. A group of three bro dudes buy a pair of camera glasses to use to record their sexploits. In a turn of events, they pick up the wrong girl, which is all I’ll say.

It’s uncomfortable watching two men engage in sexual assault, however, they do get their comeuppance. Though this short has some shoddy CGI its practical effects make-up is stellar.

Hannah Fierman who plays the “baddie” (depending on how you view the men) is brilliant. She’s so good she earned a spin-off called “Siren” in 2016.

 7. Suicide Bid – V/H/S/99

Lily is about to commit the cardinal sin of Greek life. She is only going to put in a bid for one sorority, which in Greek life is considered a suicide bid. Knowing this the girls of the sorority she pledges decide to pull a prank on Lily.

It may be because of recency bias, but this ranks so high because the scares in this film really got me. It plays into a specific fear I have and I almost couldn’t watch the screen. It moves into a supernatural element which is when it loses steam. It’s still an effective little horror short.

 6. The Sick Thing that Happened to Emily When She Was Younger – V/H/S

Another entry from the Wingard, West, and Swanberg trio. Directed by Joe Swanberg. The short with a sentence for a title follows the titular Emily. She seems to be haunted by creatures or ghosts. It plays out on Zoom with her boyfriend who is away at med school.

This comes out two years prior to Unfriended and the computer screen found footage of horror. Joe was ahead of the curve on that front. He toes the line between supernatural horror and body horror.

It is impressive that he pulls off this genre meld, along with providing some of the best scares in the franchise, with another surprise ending.

 5. Storm Drain – V/H/S/94

V/H/S 94 returns to form from Viral with a banger of an opening short. A local TV journalist is tasked with investigating a local urban legend. Something that lives in the storm drain. When she and her cameraman go into the storm drain to investigate they are not prepared for what they find.

Feels like this is becoming the cult favorite among V/H/S fans. Bonkers, but never overboard. Scary without being reliant on jump scares, and an ending everyone remembers. Storm Drain is one of the best entries in the franchise.

 4. A Ride in the Park – V/H/S/2

A man decides that it is a beautiful day for a ride on his bike in the park. So he straps a Go Pro on his helmet as he rides through a wooded area along a bike path. Soon he is stopped by a woman leading for help and before our protagonist knows it, he is being attacked by a zombie.

The short then turns into a zombie film from the perspective of a zombie. It’s such a genius idea for a horror short it could only exist in a V/H/S Film. The idea isn’t big enough to hold an audience for 90 minutes. But as shorts go this was a unique idea executed perfectly.

 3. The Empty Wake – V/H/S/94

A woman who works at a funeral home is tasked with overseeing a wake in the evening. Weirdly no one shows up and this woman is stuck in a room with a coffin of the deceased man. While this is during a storm of course the power goes out.

Another short that relies on atmosphere rather than jump scares, though this short has a couple of effective ones. It is such a simple premise yet the longer it goes the more questions begin to develop as well as tension, just waiting for something to happen. One of the few shorts in the franchise to really put me on my heels.

 2. 10/31/1998 – V/H/S

The final short on the first entry into the franchise, directed by Radio Silence. It follows a group of a few twenty-something friends who have an invite to a house/costume party. Weirdly when they arrive the house is empty. They go exploring and what they find in the attic is unexpected.

I think this short more than any other encapsulates what this franchise is all about. It has genuine scares, laughs, and a great ending. The special effects are pretty good for a low-budget short film.

It’s hard to talk about this film without revealing anything, but suffice it to say, that Radio Silence understood the assignment. Without this strong ending, I’m not sure if this franchise would’ve had the success it did.

 1. Safe Haven – V/H/S/2

Now we’ve come to the best in the franchise. A documentary crew goes to Indonesia to meet with a cult leader and have him give the crew a tour of their compound.

What ensues is a brilliant sequence of horror insanity. It is the only short in the entire franchise that would have the legs for a full-length film.

 Written by Gareth Evans and Timo Tjahjanto and directed by Evans. It’s a match made in heaven. Gareth’s slick direction and Timo’s sadistic mind make for a WTF experience that I would follow for 120 minutes.

Presenting more questions than answers, many of which do not get answered. But at the end of this short, you won’t care because the ride will have been too fun.

I hope Shudder keeps funding this franchise. Even though we get some clunkers, generally every one of these are interesting.